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Writer's pictureHannah Dearth

Don’t Do What Makes You Happy

A phrase that we misuse so often is “do what makes you happy” & this has continued to be on my heart...


Sometimes, to have anything worthwhile, (actually every time) we will not be “happy” every second of that process. Why? Happy is an emotion. It’s comes and goes...

If we are being honest...


I am not smiling ear to ear at my children as they fight going to bed after a long day for the third night in a row or maybe when they are learning how to interact with people and make an uncomfortable or not so nice comment or choice and I have to discipline them or walk through hard conversations

I am not always excited to choose a salad for lunch or get up at 5:30am to run

Mopping wood floors or cleaning out clutter does not make me shout hooray

When my husband and I have a hard time seeing eye to eye and have to sit down to work it out I do not necessarily want to kiss his face off

And it really doesn’t make me want to dance as I eye something that I want to buy and pass up a purchase big or small...


But do you know what?


Because I wasn’t “happy” all of the time

My children will know routine and structure

My children will know how to talk to and love others, and what it means to understand your feelings and talk about hard things

My body will have a better chance at feeling good and being healthy and letting me live to chase grandbabies and see milestones of people I love

My home, and things that I have acquired, will be maintained and taken care of

My husband and I will be able to work through challenges and our marriage will be able to stand the test of time, and continue to thrive

We will be better capable to handle potential unexpected crisises and plan for long term financial stability


Relationships are hard. Life is hard. All of the things are hard. And it is so an ongoing process. However, that hard and “unhappy” space is often where we grow, where we set ourself up for our futures and our long term, by deciding who we are in the present.


So... maybe next time you face that crossroads, don’t do what makes you happy? Or at least let’s think about how we define “happy”.


*In addition, as a follower of Jesus, there could be a whole other piece written, am I right? Making time to really meditate on scripture, giving money or time to others or the church, praying for those who hurt you, getting up and prioritizing what Sunday means for you, the nervousness in sharing the Gospel, being humble or patient .. and more...is hard! So hard! But the same applies, in a greater magnitude. Doing the hard things with and in Him, wanting to grow in that and having his grace when we fall short(Lord knows I need it 23355 times a day) , sets us up for more than long term, sets us up for eternity, and makes some of the above mentioned a little sweeter to manage sometimes!


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